Absolute Future

Currently listening to: "Moving Pictures" - Fall Out Boy

Fuck, man. I'm sitting here in 4th period, and I'm pretty much drunk. I'm having such a god damn hard time typing this, it's pathetic. I just drank with Laurel, Alex, and Marisa, and I'm starting to regret it. There's no way I'm gonna make it through the day without getting caught. Hell, as I'm typing this I can't even stop from swaying on my god damn stool. I really wish Laurel was here, or that someone would skip the rest of the day with me. This is gonna be really painful to go through, and I'll probably end up going home and sleeping until like 2 AM or something.

But I've been thinking about a lot of things.

Like why teenagers make stupid decisions sometimes.

For example, drinking at lunch or during school. It's just stupid, now that I think about it. If I wanna get drunk with Laurel, I'll go to her house when her parents aren't home and when I can recover with her. But nooooooooo, I had to go and be fucking stupid, and suffer. Sure, I smoked, but the drinking was totally unnecessary. And worst of all, Laurel ran off with Alex on the walk back. Almost like I wasn't even there.

But I still ask myself, why did I do this? Why do teenagers do stupid shit like this?

I think it's for the thrill of breaking the law. The adrenaline rush of drinking and being drunk in school is pretty intense, I'm not gonna lie. But at the same time, it's so fucking dumb. It's probably really easy to get caught when you're falling down stairs and staggering around to class, hanging onto your girlfriend. There's no fun involved in being drunk in this situation, and I wish I hadn't done it.

Fuck, man. Fuck my life.

Why am I such an addict?